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Feeling betrayed

I am so fucking livid right now.

So, it turns out that a guy I thought I was being nice to, giving a lift to Leather Retreat, was actually only going to write an article for Nerve.com!!! I haven't fully read the article, but in the second paragraph he begins talking about "Manflesh," and starts retelling all the little anedotes I gave him!!!!

I thought that this kid was new to the scene, and was actually curious of mind. I'm fucking livid right now. GRRRRR!!!!!

Comments

( 20 comments — Leave a comment )
msdaisy
Jun. 16th, 2003 07:36 pm (UTC)
*hug*
I understand why you feel betrayed. That is an incredibly crappy thing to do. I'm sorry you (and all the LR people) were used like that.
spike
Jun. 16th, 2003 07:37 pm (UTC)
That just plain sucks. I'm really sorry, and if I can be of any help (including buying beer), let me know.

He's an asshole.
regyt
Jun. 16th, 2003 07:45 pm (UTC)
At the end of the article, he mentions plans to try to get in with your "crew". Might I suggest that this is a fabulous opportunity to pull some sort of prank on him?
scherzoid
Jun. 16th, 2003 07:55 pm (UTC)
Uh-oh. I read the article and instantly figured out it was you, but I had no idea you'd been set up. :(
geminigirl
Jun. 16th, 2003 08:03 pm (UTC)
That is just awful, sleazy and unethical. Ew.

I am so sorry this sort of thing happened to you.
petemosq
Jun. 16th, 2003 08:16 pm (UTC)
What a bastard. It's a shame people will do these things. and I'm sorry you got duped. Big hugs man.
lengjade
Jun. 16th, 2003 08:34 pm (UTC)
Mother always said...
no good deed goes unpunished.
panther
Jun. 16th, 2003 08:43 pm (UTC)
ok, I should read chronologically before asking questions.

I'd love to see the article so I can fume with you....
*going in search now*
deafdyke
Jun. 16th, 2003 08:53 pm (UTC)
nerve
I don't know if G. Field and R. Griscom still run Nerve, but you should sent your complaints immediately and directly to whoever's running it, because no "sex positive" site would or should accept such reporting. It's unethical, scummy, and puts you at risk. Grrrrrrr
boymeat
Jun. 16th, 2003 08:56 pm (UTC)
Re: nerve
Again, I want to talk with NCSF first before I do anything.
darksong
Jun. 16th, 2003 10:40 pm (UTC)
I'm here through vampymaus's journal, and so I'm not really going to repeat what I said there, but I don't think having a journalist at such things is exactly bad, but I think the way he went about it is wrong. Yeah, maybe people wouldn't have been as open or he wouldn't have been given as much access if he had been honest about his intentions, but regardless, I think if he had gone in saying "I have an open mind and I'm writing a story about this" people still would've shared.

You did not come across badly, though, honestly.
deafdyke
Jun. 16th, 2003 11:14 pm (UTC)
dat's the point....
he didn't have an open mind. he "pulled a Jayson" for a nerve byline, and didn't much care about fact or fiction. I know exactly where BM shoulda put those two prod ends. And where'd the photo come from!?

boichick aka deafdyke (or maybe that should be cojoneschica aka blindbattle-ax)


rivermyst
Jun. 17th, 2003 04:53 am (UTC)
I peeked over here in your journal after I read the article which is also being talked about on the LR site.

That sucks. You go to do the guy a favor and he pulls this shit.

Part of why LR is great is the freedom. Now I feel like something was taken back.

The guy can't even write worth shit either.
finubala
Jun. 17th, 2003 06:57 am (UTC)
*hugs* I'm sorry to hear/read of this whole mess. What a shitty thing for that guy to do.

Wish I was closer so I could comfort you more.



boymeat
Jun. 18th, 2003 07:54 pm (UTC)
I would have enjoyed that. Know that I thought of you at camp.
finubala
Jun. 19th, 2003 04:48 pm (UTC)
You are so sweet.

I hope that you (and the others he has gotten his kicks lying about) get the apologies that you deserve, especially from that poor excuse for a human being Grant (Not-Hard and Hard-Up)Stoddard.

I can't wait to see you in October so's I can give you a big ol'hug. And other 'things'.

-Heathir
fenowyn
Jun. 17th, 2003 05:05 pm (UTC)
That sucks!
I'm sad to hear that this happened to you and the other folks that went to LR this year. All of us that help with outreach activities and work to help the vanillas run the extra risk of having more about us exposed than most folks in the scene, so my sympathies are *so* with you.

This guy was just looking for a topic to write on that is tittilating for the vanillas, that's all. It sucks that he used you to come into space that is intended for the leather community alone and turn it inside out so that the vanilla folk could gawk and tsk, or get hot, or whatever is driving them. (Being treated as a spectacle is a pet peeve of mine.)

But do look at the bright silver lining around this really dark cloud... yes, there really are people still out there that are pervy and don't know how to find sane people with the same interests. This article will tell every person that not only are they not alone, but that there is an organized community of people that welcome those who have the same interests. I'm at work, so I haven't read the article yet... but I do hope this little weenie managed to explain your willingness to take him under your wing!

Maybe the best recompense would be for the deceit would be for the online magazine to include a list of related links to educational SM organizations, so that people who read the article because they really don't know where to go can find the real scene rather than internet wannabes. Just a thought.

*Hugs!*
kahoki
Jun. 18th, 2003 07:34 pm (UTC)
Very disapointing to hear of this, and my heart goes out to you for being decieved by this hack, as LR is one of the few places that people who are into BDSM/kink can let themselves go in a safe and supportive environment.

Unlike Jack McGeorge's wranglings with his *outing by The Washington Post, don't attendies of LR have to sign waivers NOT to disclose their experiences and the people and things they are exposed to while there? A party I attended at The Group with No Mane in Austin, TX had more clauses than a SCUBA diving relases, and this sort of treachery makes it all too clear why they were so cautious
boymeat
Jun. 18th, 2003 07:38 pm (UTC)
Unfortunately, this event's signed disclaimer only had provisions against photography and sex offenders.
kahoki
Jun. 18th, 2003 08:19 pm (UTC)
Re:
That's unfortuate, though I think that has more to do with the caliber of the attndees rather than the prospect of an infiltrator.

It was actually The Group With No Name that I wanted to acknowledge (though *No Mane* may work for a pony play sub-group ;D)- I seem to be a keystorke off when typing tonight.

( 20 comments — Leave a comment )