I'm not gonna let this destroy me. Instead, I am going to push on. Do the things I need to do. And part one is going to be letting my libido take over once again... I need to play, fuck, play and fuck as much as possible. Just move on, meet new people, enjoy life somehow. Line starts here!!! (kidding)
The worst part is yet to come of course. Seeing her play with my friends in front of me. Thats so the worst... seeing what I want and had being enjoyed by people I introduced her to. But I can't ask my friends not to, or her not to... not my place. Another one of them Catch-22s. Its actually a theme in my life... I am with a girl long enough to introduce her to all my friends, and get her established in her own right, then we break up, and the rest continue to enjoy her while I stand out in the cold.
OK - I'm definetely rambling now.