February 25th, 2001


Oh... my... god. I had one of the most amazing evenings of my life last night. I went to the party last night... and we never left. Found a nice, warm space full of people that I love, and just chilled out. Then, after deciding we weren't leaving... I rolled. Its been over a year since I've done that... and this time was perfect. Nice, mellow, gentle rolling... subtle waves pouring over me.

I played with someone very close to my heart... the only person who I can say retains ownership. I would have never considered doing a scene with anyone in the rolling state I was in... but she just knows. She peers into my soul and sees exactly what I need... what would work. No words, ever. No negotiation, ever. No safewords... transcendence.

I was tied into a nice, snug rope body harness. And oh my god... the feelings that the rope left on my skin... indescribable. Each touch creating waves of pure pleasure throughout my entire body... the soft yet scratchy sensation of the rope on my fingers... my chest... my belly... A blindfold was placed on me, increasing the waves by tenfold. Then, with a firm grip on the rope, she started gently twirling me around... as if I was flying. And I let go completely... I trust her with my life. With anyone else I would have panicked immediately... but with her, it was if I was soaring into the heavens.

I knelt before her, and felt the total state of belonging that I have been longing for for weeks. I knelt, and licked her boots... worshipping her... licking the cool soft leather of the hard Wesco engineer boots... feeling her hands in my hair, feeling it all the way down to my toes.

Then, slap... a nice, firm, thud slap on my back... The force lasted forever... and she knew just when it died, as another one would take its place. Each hit went right into my soul, pulsating within me. I was being fucked... her hands on my back fucking my entire body... waves of pleasure soaring through me.

We sat, hugged, touched. Friends softly put their feet on my face, letting me absorb the sensations and smells. An adorable boy who has never thought about men caressed my back as our tongues dueled.

I feel reborn. I'm alive once again.
  • Current Music
    Exessive Force