October 7th, 2004

How I am feeling.

A lot of people have been asking me how I'm feeling. I suppose that's worth it's own little post.

I'm not quite sure how I'm feeling. I told Tessa last night that I was feeling not so good, fairly OK, not sure? That was my summary.

Last night was the first night she and I never talked in a VERY long time. It was kind of eery. I started "hearing" my cell phone when it clearly wasn't ringing. Talk about your classic mental case. Sheesh. I attempted to force myself to concentrate on other things... but yeah, I was half-expecting her to call. And then I realized - that call just wasn't going to come.

So, yeah, I'm really sad, and missing her terribly. It is quite the adjustment.

But, I know I'll live. And I know I'm OK.

My attitude is this  - she needs this time for herself, she needs me to stand away, and that could take a week, or it could last forever. But I need to allow her to walk her own path.

I had an amazing year with her. I will treasure that year forever. And, when one has had that amazing of a year, how can one be angry?

I'm not.

Star Wars - The missing scenes

You know, with all the re-writing George Lucas did on the original trilogy, I think he missed a scene.

How cool would it have been to see the later reaction of Luke & Leia's when they realized they were brother and sister, and shared such a passionate kiss in Empire Strikes Back?

Am I the only sicko to think of that?

Damn Mr. Fish.

I came home to find Mrs. Swordtail on the gravel of the tank... gone to better fishy pastures.

She was my first fish.

Mr. Swordtail looks very smug... and yet confused that he doesn't have anyone to stick his tail into.

I seriously want to flush him down the toilet. But that would be cruel.

Wouldn't it?

Poor film selection

Will someone in god's name please tell me why I opted to turn on Showtime just when it was showing the last 1/4 of Glory - a movie that arguably has the saddest ending ever?