June 15th, 2005

Why I haven't been posting.

Because I'm a fucking ball of stress, that's why.

I have LPN coming Sat night, which also equates to a whole lot of work for moi.

There are lots of people coming in town this weekend that I want to see, and it is stressing me that I won't see them all.

And I'm apartment hunting. Which quite frankly is potentially bringing me to tears. I lived in the past year in a fantasy land, and reality is kicking me hardcore.

I'm also job-hunting. I need to better myself and make more money. And that is stressing me out.

I am also realizing I need to do something about my martyr syndrome and my feelings of guilt. This is affecting many parts of my life. I hesitate to do the right thing for me because it might not be the best thing for others. This is affecting me in relationships, professional, and day-to-day spheres of life.

Not sure how to solve that one.

I'm feeling very on edge today. Something will break soon. Hopefully it will be the kind of break that alleviates some of the stress... not a break in which I am in the corner balling my eyes out.

Using livejournal as an emotional springboard - so passe for me. Argh.
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    stressed stressed