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Literary escapism.

As mentioned in a previous post, my grandmother's tombstone is to be unveiled tomorrow. Thus, I am currently at my parents' place in Brooklyn, already in the presence of one of my extended relatives. The unfortunate part is that the side of the family I am and will be surrounded by tomorrow are raging moronic monkeys who constantly war with each other over the most amazingly simplistic things. My patience is already very thin, and it will be a wonder if I make it through tomorrow without either my voice shouting out with much anger or having to choke back the instinct of performing horrible violence on them.

Really, it is that bad.

So, I try to create my own escapes. Luckily, I brought my iPod and a fabulous book with me. One of my favorites, in fact... Catch-22 by Joseph Heller.

I would like to share a little passage with you now that is filling me with joy.

A little background - Lieutenant Scheisskopf is obsessed with parades, and has just won the ultimate parade competiton prize.

"That Lieutenant Scheisskopf," Lieutenant Travers remarked. "He's a military genius."

"Yes, he really is," Lieutenant Engle agreed. "It's a pity the schmuck won't whip his wife."

"I don't see what that has to do with it," Lieutenant Travers answered cooly. "Lieutenant Bemis whips Mrs. Bemis beautifully every time they have sexual intercourse, and he isn't worth a farthing at parades."

"I'm talking about flagellation," Lieutenant Engle retorted. "Who gives a damn about parades?"


Who gives a damn, indeed. Bravo, Mr. Heller.

Comments

( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
horror24fps
Aug. 20th, 2006 03:11 am (UTC)
If I may be so bold, allow me to suggest pseudopod.org and escapepod.org for excellent short horror and science fiction stories respectively. Highly diverting. - Atari
bearsir
Aug. 20th, 2006 03:21 am (UTC)
In those situations - and really, I feel like we could bond extensively about the particular ways in which Jewish families can do that sort of constant, high-volume, high-intensity argument about nothing - I usually manage to avoid getting sucked in my using the opportunity to indulge in really filthy sexual fantasies about whomever I might be seeing soon. Granted that this may be anatomically a little more convenient for me than for you, but even still, it has saved my sanity on many occassions. Good luck.
lawnrrd
Aug. 20th, 2006 03:28 am (UTC)
One of these days, we should talk about the various lawsuits within my family that add up to more than a generation of intra-familial litigation.
naudia
Aug. 20th, 2006 05:05 am (UTC)
Family is both in the position to cause the most harm, and to make you feel inadequate for feeling the effects of said harm. I'm so sorry to hear that you are dealing with all of this. If you need a shoulder to cry on, or (given permission) a back to mutilate..You know my number. Even if all you need is a hug and cup of coffee, the trip to Brooklyn is not *that* far.
(Deleted comment)
boymeat
Aug. 21st, 2006 07:17 pm (UTC)
Re: Here's something to bring you back to your own reality
Sadly neglected. This will change tonight.
(Deleted comment)
njlexi
Aug. 20th, 2006 10:45 pm (UTC)
Thanks for the quote ... i must pick it up sometime.

Sorry you are going thru such a rough time with your family. *rubs shoulders*
boymeat
Aug. 21st, 2006 07:17 pm (UTC)
Yes, you really must read Catch-22. You will love it.
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )