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Overheard in NYC or call to NYPD?

I just got threatened in front of my work building. For a cigarette.

I'm standing, reading a magazine, minding my own business while smoking a cigarette before getting lunch. A dirty-looking man on a bicycle rolls up to me.

Man - "Gimme a cigarette."
Me - "No."
Man - " Why not?"
Me looking increduosly - "Because this is my last one."
Man - "Bullshit. I see your pack in your pocket."
Me pissed off - "Tough shit."
Man - "Yeah? Maybe I should throw you against the wall and break your skull? Huh? Maybe I should run over your shoes with my
bicycle. Then you'd be wishing you gave me a cigarette."
Me - "Yeah, I bet I would."

I threw my cigarette away and walked into the restaurant.

Unbelieveable. I didn't know I had an obligation to give a cigarette to anyone who asks.


( 20 comments — Leave a comment )
Sep. 21st, 2006 05:32 pm (UTC)
Wow, talk about entitlement....
Sep. 21st, 2006 05:57 pm (UTC)
When are you going to quit smoking?
Sep. 21st, 2006 06:09 pm (UTC)
"Maybe I should run over your shoes with my bicycle"??!?!?!?!?!

It's nice when people are creative about being assholes, it really makes the whole thing much more fun.
Sep. 21st, 2006 06:39 pm (UTC)
It's the lack of please in the initial request that pisses me off. I strongly believe in cigarette karma and will almost always give a cigarette when asked... so long as I'm asked nicely.
Sep. 21st, 2006 07:00 pm (UTC)
It was made very clear that my cigarettes clearly belonged to him, and not I, like I previously thought.
Sep. 21st, 2006 06:41 pm (UTC)
*Rips off clothes to reveal GRAMMAR NAZI superhero costume*

I believe you meant incredulously, and you have to use it with the object:

Me, looking at him incredulously:
Me, looking incredulous:

*flounces off to correct an evildoer who believes that apostrophes denote a plural. Do you have my shoe's?*

... except that ripping off one's clothes to reveal a superhero costume doesn't quite work that well if one is already only wearing panties.
Sep. 21st, 2006 06:43 pm (UTC)
I should be there to truly rip off the clothing.
Sep. 21st, 2006 06:52 pm (UTC)
Agrees :-)

Will you be at BR in december? There's a chance I might go to that
Sep. 21st, 2006 06:57 pm (UTC)
I sure will be. You can bottom in one of my classes for me, too.
Sep. 21st, 2006 08:09 pm (UTC)
Which classes are you teaching? There doesn't seem to be a class list yet on the event site.

And I know you'll love this, my twin sister is going to be attending as well. :grin:
Sep. 22nd, 2006 03:54 am (UTC)
Sep. 21st, 2006 06:44 pm (UTC)
Would you mind terribly if I appropriated that dialogue as a script for my next Rough Sex scene? I'll change it around a little, y'know, so here's no copyright issue. ;-)
Sep. 21st, 2006 07:02 pm (UTC)
Oh, take it freely. Just invite me. ;-)
Sep. 21st, 2006 07:18 pm (UTC)
I think Lolita said it best....
Take it as a sign to quit smoking. ;)
Sep. 22nd, 2006 03:53 am (UTC)
Sep. 21st, 2006 07:42 pm (UTC)
I've always said smoking was dangerous to your health.
Sep. 21st, 2006 07:43 pm (UTC)
New Yorkers ;P
Sep. 21st, 2006 10:53 pm (UTC)
Wait, slow down, I'm confused. Can someone please explain for the innocent Midwestern girls who don't understand how things work in the big scary city: Was the dirty man the one who was riding the bicycle or the one who was reading the magazine?
Sep. 21st, 2006 11:17 pm (UTC)
"I didn't know I had an obligation to give a cigarette to anyone who asks."
Really? I thought those were the rules.
Sep. 22nd, 2006 12:06 pm (UTC)
Awhile back, my friend and I were walking down Bourbon Street and got the following from a scruffy character sitting on the stoop:

Got any spare change? Nope

Got a cigarette? Nope

Got any toilet paper? No! Why would we need any toilet paper walking around in the French Quarter?

Cause you two are a pair of shitty assholes!

By the time of the last exchange, we had walked past the stoop and didn't think it was worth getting into it with the streetlife as opposed to moving on with our appointed rounds.

A recent experience in a Boston T stop found me on the actual business end of a bum rush, as some old and skinny down on his luck guy zipped right into the opposite side of the turnstyle when I had already swiped my pass and was walking through. Rather than back up since he was leaving, I had to back up when he pushed his way through, canceling out my transaction. My guess is that once you are that disinfrnacished you developed a don't give a damn attitude and a more ferral disposition towards *normal* people as they are the haves while you are the have not. That also breeds a snarky sense of entitlement that is often in the mindset of "Gotta give me somethin", even if it is your time and composure and they aggrevate you with their interuption of what you are doing.
( 20 comments — Leave a comment )