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Please help if you can!

An important member of the sex-positive community 
urgently needs our help.

Jefferson—blogger, educator, and friend to so many of us—is at this moment fighting a court battle with his ex-wife, who is seeking full custody of their three children. 

Jefferson's love for his children has been well-documented on his blog One Life, Take Two for years. His ex-wife has stated in court that he is a "great" father who loves his children. 

However, among her claims is that his
bisexuality makes him an unfit parent.

Jefferson needs our help now. As a writer, his resources are limited. The costs of fighting this case are mounting quickly—and will certainly run into the tens of thousands of dollars.

As of today, there is an urgent and immediate need for at least $20,000 to cover costs associated with attorney fees and those of the law guardian who has been appointed to represent the children.

If he is unable to pay these fees by August 11, he will be forced to relinquish custody of his children.

This case is of concern to anyone whose sexuality does not fit the standard mold—because it could happen to you. This case is of concern to all writers, because Jefferson’s blog is being used as evidence against him—and that could have repercussions for our First Amendment rights.

Here’s how to help:

Make an ANONYMOUS, TAX-DEDUCTIBLE contribution to Jefferson’s legal defense by visiting the Sexual Freedom Defense and Education Fund at:


There you will find out how to donate to Jefferson’s Defense Fund via PayPal or if you prefer, check or money order.

Please note that you MUST mention that your donation is to be used for the JEFFERSON LEGAL DEFENSE FUND.

In the coming days, www.onelifetaketwo.com will be relaunched with information about Jefferson's ongoing case. Be sure to visit his blog for updates. In the meantime, you can contact Jefferson directly at friendsofjefferson@gmail.com.

Thanks very much for your time and concern.

Feel free to copy this and post it to your blog or LJ or any email lists.  Or link here.


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 5th, 2008 02:18 pm (UTC)
Phil, I want to point out a couple of things here:

1) I had to fight a legal custody battle over my son, where I was being called an unfit parent because I was transgender (not because of the other parent, but by the court *itself*), and I was disabled (by the other parent and the court). I won. I didn't pay out my a** in legal fees. In fact it cost me very little. Shana and I just had to do some research, and put all our ducks in a row.

2) IN New York, Parents are entitled to legal defense for free in family court and custody battles if they need it and are indigent (cannot afford a lawyer themselves, or run out of funds for a lawyer). Now switching lawyers mid-stream is not neccesarily good, but I had to do it (because the one they assigned me originally was a total idiot AND a bigot, and didn't want to represent a transsexual or a lesbian.

3) In New York City especially it is illegal to use questions of sexuality against the parent (unless its something like SM, and only if the child somehow bears witness or is exposed to it).

I'm sorry this person is going through this, this is something I have been dealing with over the past few years, but in New York, the court is not going to take total custody away from a parent unless they are totally unfit, and even then, its EXTREMELY difficult (a person can have a founded (true) ACS/CPS report on them and still have unsupervised visitations and shared legal responsibility). I managed to fight almost the same custody case in an unfriendly legal setting (Nassau County is EXTREMELY conservative, without financial backing.

There are some things he can do (or maybe he has) like file counterclaims for custody the other way (effectively making both of them plaintiffs)

The other thing is - the Law Guardian is paid for BY THE STATE, not the parents. If they are telling him otherwise, then someone is being scammed.

Again, I'm sorry anyone has to go through this, it is an extremely trying experience, but the best thing to have is someone who knows the ins and outs of the NY Family Court and Legal System (Superior Court) from a parent's perspective (not a lawyers) on their side to ask questions and get support. I didn't have that, but I wish I had. Shana and I had to do all kinds of research and work, and practically represent ourselves, where someone with the knowledge we came across would have been invaluable and saved us a lot of time and energy. If you know him, and want to pass on Shana's contact info (she's more likely to get email, not having to sift through hundreds of emails a day), go ahead.
Aug. 5th, 2008 02:54 pm (UTC)
Thank you for the comment - I've passed it on to Jefferson.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )