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Asshole - RIP

Today, my oldest fish, Asshole, died.

He was a good fish, even if he was an asshole.

I had him for three years. He was one the 3rd fish I bought when I first started this tank oh so long ago. Somehow he survived my bungling efforts to keep a tank when I really didn't know what I was doing. Despite all his original tank mates quickly passing, Asshole persevered.

When I bought him, he was oh so small. A beautiful a little thing, fluttering this way and that throughout my tank. So pretty, so cute.

Then he grew.

As he grew, so did his hunger. If known for anything, it was for being a voracious eater. Whenever anyone, and I do mean anyone, approached the tank, he looked at them with excitement. Because someone approaching the tank must have meant that he was about to receive his greatest treasure - food. And oh he would eat. He would eat all he could find near him, and then chase away other fish and eat the food near them. I would drop pellets for my loaches, and after he was done with the flakes, he would eat those too.

And five minutes after the feeding frenzy ended, he would look at you expectantly, as if to say... "That's it?"

He was a half of an inch when I bought him. Today, he was over 6 inches wide. A true monster of the tank.

I wanted to give him the traditional burial at sea (toilet), but alas, he was too big.

When he first stopped eating two weeks ago, I knew the end was near. Asshole not eating was true testimony that he was ready for the next plane of fishy existence.

He died amongst the company of other fish, in a similar way to humans. As he died, the loaches argued amongst themselves who would get his possessions.

Goodbye Asshole. I miss you already.


( 16 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 9th, 2008 09:07 pm (UTC)
*Has a moment of silence for asshole*

He sounded like an amusing fish. His ability to eat sounds like that of my rats.
Aug. 9th, 2008 09:16 pm (UTC)
Rest in peace, Asshole. I miss keeping fish.
Aug. 9th, 2008 10:06 pm (UTC)
lightin' a candle for your fish
Aug. 9th, 2008 11:31 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry I never got to meet Asshole, he sounds like a great fish.
Aug. 9th, 2008 11:46 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry. People have laughed at me when I would become emotionally attached to a particular fish. But I get where you are coming from.
Aug. 10th, 2008 12:57 am (UTC)
Asshole sleeps with the fishes. I'm sorry.
Aug. 10th, 2008 08:26 am (UTC)
Aug. 10th, 2008 11:52 am (UTC)
Hail and Farewell, Asshole. He's swimming in the creek under the rainbow bridge.
Aug. 10th, 2008 01:08 pm (UTC)

I've had the sad task of bidding farewell to my fish buddies once upon a time.

I hope you're doing ok.
Aug. 10th, 2008 07:16 pm (UTC)
I read your subject first and thought you were talking about Bernie Mac. :)

Sorry about the fishie. *hugs*
Aug. 11th, 2008 03:35 am (UTC)
Now that was funny.
Aug. 11th, 2008 03:52 am (UTC)
:) Thx.
Aug. 11th, 2008 03:34 am (UTC)
*hug* i'm sorry to hear
Aug. 11th, 2008 05:34 pm (UTC)
He had a wonderful life being cared for by you, you treated him with more kindness and forebearance than nature would have. Good fish.
Aug. 12th, 2008 03:38 am (UTC)
RIP. Asshole. You will be well remembered.
Aug. 12th, 2008 07:34 am (UTC)
Goodbye Asshole.
You will forever be memorialized in Boymeat's posts.
( 16 comments — Leave a comment )